Lost...

At the end of my last post I mentioned how I'm a little confused in life at the moment. There are so many options, and, at moments, I feel like no direction is offered.

This pretty much sums up my feelings on the whole issue.

Now, this post is not to inform you of my sudden inspiration of figuring everything out. It's more of a comfort post for hopefully more than me. I started school this week (one week down!) and I'm in a Doctrine and Covenants 2nd half class. Our first reading assignment was sections 77-81, and I read through them without looking for anything specific. However, I reached section 79 and I started paying a little more attention, and it has helped me out a lot this week; specifically verse 2-3...

"(2) And I will send upon him the Comforter, which shall teach him the truth and the way whither he shall go; (3) And inasmuch as he is faithful, I will crown him again with sheaves."

I wasn't quite sure what being "crowned with sheaves" meant, so I looked it up through the Latter-day Saint website. The first help I came across was in the D&C institute manual;

"Anciently, grain was cut by hand and tied into large bundles or sheaves which were then carried to the place of threshing. To see a person or an animal “laden with many sheaves” ( D&C 75:5 ) was proof that the person had reaped an abundant harvest and would now enjoy the fruits of his labors"

So my interpretation of these verses is this... if we are faithful and doing the best that we can, the Lord is going to comfort us. He is going to provide us with direction, and we will be blessed and "enjoy the fruits of our labors."

I may not know where I'm exactly going in life, but I know that I am going to be faithful to my Heavenly Father. I know that He loves me and will provide me with direction, and although I may have trails I will be able come out on top and enjoy the blessings that will be given to me.

I hope that this post provides a little comfort for you all. We are not alone, and all we need to do is rely on the Lord. 

Change.

Those that know me will already agree with what I'm about to say (especially if your names are Mom or Dad ;) ).

I hate change.

No...not the kind of change that I put in my piggy bank... the kind of change that means you are going to have to do something different in your life. Now I'm not afraid to make little changes in my life; getting up earlier, eating something different, buying clothes, and the list could go on for a while. I hate the kind of changes that are going to alter your life direction.

Here I am doing just fine on my little road of life when this sign shows up. Change? Wait. I don't need to change. This road is going just as it needs to... I don't need to get off that exit. No worries enter my mind until I keep seeing the sign and then I start to understand that change is the only way to go. Denial is usually how I deal with this. What!? I'm not ready to change!! Maybe I'll be okay staying the way I am... I mean, it's gotten me this far hasn't it?? Yeah, that's right. I'm going to be fine on my little road. However, as the miles pass behind I slowly start to realize that change is inevitable. I keep cruising along thinking about how different things are going to be when my worst fears are confirmed.

I really have no choice about this exit and it's coming up too fast for me. Now saying that this is my worst fear is a little over-exaggerated. I know change isn't going to kill me, and I know it's for the best. In fact, while I was coming to the conclusion that change is inevitable I considered everything that will be positive from this experience, how much I will benefit, what I will get to see and who I will get to meet. Logically, I can understand why I want the change and I'm almost okay with it until I almost reach the turning point.

Okay. This is really happening. This... this is really happening. There's no way I can stall now and I'm pretty sure that I am not going to be able to handle this. Breaking point begins. I'm usually a mess and I can't keep myself under control and I hate it. Remember the part about being able to think through all the positive things logically? Yeah, pretty much I feel like that part of my brain decides to malfunction.

I take the exit and lots of new things bombard me and I'm not quite sure how to handle it. However, pretty soon I start to get the hang of things and I'm okay with the changes. In fact, I even start to enjoy them.

Now, I'm writing this post right before the start of a new semester, new roommates, new apartment, new classes, and me not even being sure where I am in life right now. Do I want to change my major? Go to a different school? Country? Let's be honest. I have no idea, and I don't plan on figuring it out right now. But I know those change signs are going to come up in my life and right now I'm ready for them. Right before the exit...not so much, that whole malfunctioning will kick back in and I'll be a wreck. However, it's for my own good...right?

Twin Falls

So I've decided that I need to go to Twin Falls relatively soon.

I miss these guys!!

I miss all my other family too...these guys just live closer... :)

Youcam

So... me and my cousins have a tradition of taking pictures on my youcam every time they come up. And I'm not kidding. EVERY time. We seriously laugh our heads off taking them and we have hundreds of photos. Hundreds and hundreds and hundreds!!

And guess what? We never ever get tired of it. Seriously. As I was creating a collage my little 7-year old cousin, Madison, was literally snorting as we looked through all of the ones we took. I'm not joking. I told her to get off my lap because I couldn't even hold her anymore!!!

We've had a ton of fun so far, and we plan to take many more; but here is a very tiny selection of all of our photos!

Smile :)

I mentioned in my last post and one a long time ago that smiling at someone, even if you don't know them, can be a very positive moment in your day.

Let's be honest, sometimes a stranger smiles at me and I think they are a downright creeper. Or weird. Or psycho. Or a million other things. However, if I think one of those million things and it all just ends with smiles being exchanged then I am okay with it all. It still counts as a plus in the day for me. So try and overlook your judgmental thoughts and take the smile in a good way. That person is (hopefully) not a creeper or anything so just keep walking and be more happy because someone took the time to smile your way.

So, I have a challenge for you all.

Or today, or the day after tomorrow, or just every day; take a moment to smile at a stranger and really mean it. You don't have to say anything if you don't want to, but I guarantee that little smile will help the stranger have a better day. Who knows? If you let it, it might help you have a better day too. :)

Attitude

Life. In short, it's all over the place and you never know what's going to happen. It could be great, or it could be down-right awful. However, it's how we view this craziness that determines how much we enjoy life.

When it comes to roller coasters screaming and enjoying the ride are basically simultaneous in my book. When it comes to life, on the other hand, they are definitely separate chapters.

There are ups and downs every day. Whether they be big downs and small ups, or small ups and big downs; or maybe even big ups and downs, or small ups and downs. Those ups and downs are always there, but it's up to us how much we focus on them and make them a part of our life.

Imagine a day where everything is going wrong... I can think of multiple. Some of them I wake up feeling on top of the world, and then I actually get out of bed and everything that could possibly go wrong does, and I don't know how I'm going to handle it. This is when you need to focus on the ups.

In an earlier post I mentioned that we need to enjoy the simple things. This is so true. Think of anything positive in your day; anything. Great hair day, sunshine, you talked to someone cute, you got to class on time, someone smiled at you... maybe you can't pick out anything little, but at the end of the day think, 'hey! This day is over, and tomorrow can bring something better!'

Yeah... a little bit cheesy and a lot a bit cliche...but seriously.

You have so much power over how you view life. Of course there are things out of your control; your car breaks down, you get sick, group members don't help out, issues with people, too much to do and the list could go on forever. Literally. It's easy to focus on these downs and pretty much be miserable. But we are not here to be miserable. We are here to live the best life that we can.

Attitude is everything. Wake up each day saying 'I am going to rock today.' No matter what comes your way you are going to make the best of it. I'm not saying this is easy to do. Personally, I epically fail at this most days. Nevertheless, when I do have this positive attitude it makes all the difference.

Let's be honest. Everything could be going wrong in your life. You have no hope, and nothing is ever going to be the same again, but choose to love what's going right, because I guarantee that there is at least one thing going right and whether that one thing be big or small; it's worth it.

Reading...

So I kinda like to read....okay, I love reading. I love being able to get into a story and feel apart of it and get to know the characters. I love wondering what's going to happen and figuring it out page by page. I love the suspense, the mystery, the romance, the fantasy, the non-fiction, the action...almost anything I can get my hands on.

Now, don't judge me when you finishing reading this paragraph... I love books. I love the smell of a new book that's never been opened, I love the feel of the pages on my fingertips, I love being able to feel how much you've read and how much you have left. I will always feel that way, BUT... I do own a Kindle (this is where the 'don't judge me part' comes in). Even though I love everything about a book and I won't just stick to reading my Kindle, it's really nice to have a Kindle! Especially when I'm traveling.... no worries about ripped, bent, destroyed pages, or finding a bag that will fit everything you want to read on your vacation. It's just all right there and it fits right in your purse...or it can look like a manly planner of some sorts. :) Anywho. I'm not here to rave about how convenient a Kindle is...

With my love of reading comes no inhibitions when it comes to my reactions. I've had a couple books make me cry, and some even make me angry! My favorite, though, is when they make me laugh. I just get into my own little zone of reading and pop! there's a joke, or a funny scene, or just something humorous to me; I can't help but to laugh. Sometimes I find whatever I just read to be so hilarious that I keep laughing and I can't even continue reading. There is absolutely noooooo problem with this in my book...but I do get a lot of odd looks...